How to overcome a lack of self-confidence?

Lack of self-confidence is a malaise characterized by the individual’s tendency to not believe in his or her abilities, to think himself inferior to others and generally unable to achieve some of his or her goals and ambitions. Lack of self-confidence is widespread, and few people never suffer from it in their lifetime, and this can affect everyone, regardless of gender, class, sex or age. A lack of self-confidence can still end up having a negative impact on all spheres of our lives: professional, sentimental, social or personal.

What are the causes of a lack of self-confidence?

The causes of a lack of self-confidence can be found in everyday life, or more deeply in important events in our lives.

Life events

In some cases, the lack of self-confidence can be traced back to a succession of events and experiences during childhood or adolescence (bullying, mockery, failure in love, criticism, etc...). In other cases, it is a consequence of life events (break-up, professional failure, etc.).

Daily life

Some “bad” habits can intensify self-confidence:

• Tendency to devalue

• Surround yourself with negative people

• Feeling persecuted and constantly being judged

• Tendency to compare oneself with others

• Let others decide for themselves

• Never dare to say no, or affirm

How do you know if you suffer from a lack of self-confidence?

A number of signs of low self-esteem can alert you if you are likely to:

• always justify yourself

• do things you don’t want to

• not being comfortable with your successes

• not appreciate compliments

• not like being in the center of attention

• not to accept criticism

• Not like speaking in meetings or in public.

How to overcome a lack of self-confidence?

It is important to implement behavioral strategies that reverse habits that contain, isolate and accentuate low self-esteem. Although it may seem “reassuring” to be in avoidance (to reduce the anxiety associated with assertiveness), these habits maintain embarrassment and isolation.

If you feel that your lack of self-confidence is a barrier to your personal development and fulfillment (love life, social, professional, personal, etc.), consulting a specialized psychologist will allow you to reverse the trend to find a better balance of life.

A psychologist will help you identify the causes of your lack of self-confidence, whether they are:

• Internals: self-deprecating thinking patterns, social anxiety, fear of rejection, life trauma, etc.

• External: social relationship anxiogenic (contact with toxic people, rabaissantes, etc.).

I will also help you find the answers to give in order to allow you to gain self-esteem:

Daily changes: self-assertion techniques, relaxation techniques, tips to live better your relationships with others, etc.

Profound changes: work on life episodes that have generated a decrease in confidence in you, improvement of your social interactions (love, friends, work, etc.).

Cognitive-behavioral therapies, RITMO and EFT are mainly recommended to treat this problem.

Need to talk about your struggle? Find a counselor in Hong Kong and let's book a session here.

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